Showing posts with label car accident. Show all posts
Showing posts with label car accident. Show all posts

Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Fear of the Worst







       
     I am amazed at how many times painful situations can change our lives for the best. I believe it is important to “rejoice always” as the Bible says (Philippians 4:4) and always be grateful to God no matter what. To rejoice means to celebrate, to be glad, to be very pleased.

As we go through life, we sometimes face difficult situations, sad moments and challenging times moments in which what we experience is not what we would have chosen or what we had planned. For example, we can receive bad news, have to say goodbye to a friend or loved one, go through a separation, a divorce or be fired from a job. When these things happen, we find it hard to rejoice, and we might feel it is hard to be grateful to God. At these times, we need to remind ourselves of the importance of being always grateful and ask God to give us the grace to rejoice. As it says in Philippians, we need to “rejoice always”! Not sometimes. Not only when things happen as we wish. Not only when we are happy and we think the situation is fair. Not only when things go our way. No, it says “always.”

It also says “Have no anxiety at all.” (Philippians 4:6) This leaves room for zero anxiety, zero distress, zero sorrow, zero worry and zero fear. But we are humans, biological as well as spiritual creatures. Sometimes our heart aches, our emotions get the best of us, our brain does not understand why things have to change or why things have to be so hard. It is sometimes hard to rejoice or feel grateful. It is human to feel sad. So what are we to do? How can we rejoice always?

            In the Bible, we are advised to do three things: Be grateful, pray and think about the good!

Be grateful. The Bible says we should be “giving thanks always and for everything.” (Ephesians 5:20) Let’s be grateful to God every day, all the time, no matter what, especially when we are not in the mood or when we are weighed down with burdens. Let’s never say, “I can’t be grateful for this or for that.” We can feel grateful because in a bad situation we had the opportunity to learn a lesson or because within a bad situation things could always have been worse. In every situation, we can find something to be grateful for. For example, when someone we love leaves us, we can be grateful that we had the blessing of meeting that person and having had that person in our lives.

To feel grateful, we need to remember two things. First, we need to remember as St.  Francis said that “nothing is ours! Great wisdom will come to us as we meditate upon this thought until we become firmly convinced of it we own nothing. Everything has been entrusted to us for a limited time only.” The chance to share our love with others is a gift from God. Sometimes we get possessive and forget that nothing is ours and everything is God’s. If we have anything even for a limited time, it is thanks to His greatness, kindness and loving heart. It is a gift.

            We are blessed to have all the things we treasure in our lives, all our friends, our family, our children, our opportunities, our experiences, our health, our youth, our intelligence and our skills. But when the time comes to say goodbye, when time is up, we need to let go. We need to keep the good memories, learn whatever lesson the experience left behind, grieve what needs to be grieved and then find the courage to keep on going.

            When God calls for a change in our life and/or in the life of a friend or loved one, we need to be ready to lovingly say: “Yes!” Sometimes we can be like spoiled children, whose parents have taken them to Disneyland and who have a tantrum when the vacation is over and it is time to go home. Instead of saying thank you for all they have enjoyed there and appreciating how good and loving their parents were, these children have a tantrum because they want to stay longer. They disregard the precious gift their parents have given them, and they focus instead on what they can no longer have. Let’s not be like spoiled children. Let’s be loving, obedient children of our heavenly Father.

            The second thing we need to remember in order to feel grateful in every situation is to be humble. Humble means: meek, docile, calm, submissive, obedient, soft and gentle. It is the opposite of being proud and having a big ego. It is the opposite of “I want it my way,” “I don’t want it this way” and “I don’t like it that way.” We can be excited and full of joy at what lies ahead, but we must also be detached from everything and be ready to give it up if necessary. Let’s be meek and humble of heart, like Jesus (Matthew 11:29), so that we can let go when God calls us to let go.

Pray. In order to rejoice always, the second thing the Bible advises us to do is to “pray without ceasing.” (1 Thessalonians 5:17). In Philippians 4:6, we are called to pray “with thanksgiving.” If we are upset and ungrateful and complaining, then we are not praying with thanksgiving! Once we have a life of prayer, then we can be sure that “the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:7) Even if we do not understand why, even if the situation is hard to accept, we must pray and try to rejoice, and then God’s peace will guard our hearts.

Think about good things. The Bible says: “Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.” (Philippians 4:8) We can manage our brain well and keep our emotions in check, but we need to want to do it, and we need to put effort into it. We must make a conscious choice to focus on all the good we have. We choose where we set your eyes, either on all that is good in our life or on all that is bad. If someone says, “There is nothing good I can think of right now,” we should remember that there is always God’s love to feel happy about. We should never say, “I cannot thank God for this” or “I have nothing to be grateful for.” Instead, as Mother Teresa advised, “we should make a commitment to see every experience, whether good or bad, happy or sad, as a magnificent opportunity to do something beautiful for God.” In the toughest moments we encounter, we give glory to God if we gather the strength to smile and trust and thank, even if that is all we can do.



Wisdom to contemplate:


“And over all these put on love, that is, the bond of perfection. And let the peace of Christ control your hearts, the peace into which you were also called in one body. And be thankful.” (Colossians 3:14-15)



“No trial has come to you but what is human. God is faithful and will not let you be tried beyond your strength; but with the trial he will also provide a way out, so that you may be able to bear it.” (1 Corinthians 10:13)





Friday, July 25, 2014

Painful situations can bring us together








Isn’t it ironic how in a blink of an eye our whole life can change? We often have a hard time realizing how lucky and blessed we are when everything in our lives is running smoothly. In one second our life can hang by a thread, in a moment our life can come to an end but we go about our lives refusing to think about it. It is a subject we do not want to address. We hardly ever stop to think about the frailty of our lives and about how much we need God. We end up wasting time in meaningless things and vain pursuits precious time that could have been spent deepening our relationship with God, mending broken relationships, improving ourselves, loving more, sharing more, finding more reasons to be happy and fewer reasons to be sad.

            We do not like to think about these things, but perhaps we should because then we could be somewhat more prepared when hard times come. Oftentimes, it is when we go through hardships that we find out what we are made of. It is then that we are given an opportunity to draw on the grace God has given us, an opportunity to exercise our strength, wisdom, love, patience, kindness and faith. It is in distressing times that we really come to experience the protection and mercy of God. If we can be ready for these tough times, through prayer, then a tragedy, a catastrophe or a great tribulation can be the source of spiritual growth and some of the biggest blessings in our lives.

            Sometimes, no matter how much we have prayed and how ready we think we are to face anything, when a terrible situation comes our way, we feel like St. Augustine when he wrote in his Confessions that he was “appalled at a world that could go on as though our catastrophe had not happened.” We feel drained, we feel frozen, and only hope remains.

            Many valuable lessons can be learned about hope, faith, endurance and strength. One of the greatest lessons is that the driving force behind all of these qualities is love. God has given us human beings an amazing capacity to survive the most heartbreaking moments. The great love of God that unites and that pours out from family members, friends and even strangers becomes the solid foundation that sustains us when we most need it, that great love that many times gets forgotten in the rush of everyday life.

            There are many amazing stories about people who have survived adversity and found it has not only changed their lives but touched the lives of many others as well. These are people who have survived by holding on to hope. Sometimes hope is all we need in order to make it through one more day. And one more day is all we need in order to make it through the rest of our lives¾because each new day brings renewed hope and a renewed understanding that God has given us the strength to endure difficult times and the courage to go on.

            Hope gives us strength when adversity pushes us to the limit. In adversity, hope gives us the ability to open our eyes and see what is really of value in life. Many people’s lives change forever because in hope they find meaning to their suffering. Great difficulties can pull people together, and many times great difficulties can produce forgiveness. Difficult times and problems are part of life, but it is how we choose to see these moments and how we choose to act in these times that will determine if they are in vain or not.








Wisdom to contemplate:

 “Hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out into our hearts through the holy Spirit that has been given to us.” (Romans 5:5)


“He rescued us from such great danger of death, and he will continue to rescue us; in him we have put our hope (that) he will also rescue us again.” (2 Corinthians 1:10)


“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and God of all encouragement, who encourages us in our every affliction, so that we may be able to encourage those who are in any affliction with the encouragement with which we ourselves are encouraged by God.” (2 Corinthians 1:3-4)