The dangers of fear

Fear is normal and natural. Many times, our fears are even well founded. So it is not good to deny our fears or to try to suppress them. Our fears should be confronted and beaten. Sometimes what we need to do to defeat a fear is to share it with someone¾a loved one, an advisor, a teacher, a friend. Other times, we can do research and read about the subject and see how others feel about it. Many times, sharing with others and realizing that others go through the same fears help us deal with our own fears.

            Fear is something we all have to deal with at some point or another. It can be fear about events in our daily life, such as losing our job, getting sick, getting into an accident or losing our loved ones. Or it can be fear about more intangible things, such as fear of certain unexplained experiences. When we were younger, many of us have suffered from fear after watching scary movies about Dracula, Freddy Krueger or poltergeists. Many of us have spent nights without sleep. Many of us have had horrible nightmares or strange dreams, and some of us might even have had weird, unexplainable experiences while we were awake.

            Fear can be our worse enemy. The best way to beat our fears is to call on God’s help. He is the Almighty, and under His wings we can take refuge. All we have to do is pray and call on the power of His name, and He will deliver us from our fears before we know it.

But still, as always, we must do our part. One successful way to protect ourselves from our fears is not to obsess about them. There are many unexplained things here on this earth. We do not need to look into all of them. If we knock, the door will be opened…but we must be careful where we are knocking. Let’s be careful about what we mess with. Some things can easily get out of our control. Let’s set boundaries for ourselves, so that we do not accidentally fall victim to what we are most afraid of. We should stay away from the dark side of life, in other words we should stay away from the occult. If we choose to stay in the light, we will minimize our chances of getting hurt physically or psychologically. Let’s not mess with the esoteric. Let’s let some mysteries remain mysteries. And let’s put our focus and our trust on God. Our Father in heaven loves us and wants to keep us safe under His umbrella of protection.

            We must trust our instincts. Every time we get a bad feeling about something we cannot explain, we should try to listen to it. There are many reasons why we might get a feeling about a particular thing. Not everything can be explained logically, but this does not mean that it is not real. If we become people who rely only on facts, then we will limit ourselves to the five senses, and that will not give us a complete picture. Quantum physics has demonstrated that nothing has been proven for sure and that everything is possible. Time after time, something scientists believed to be the absolute truth has been proven wrong. Now scientists know only one thing is for sure, and that is that nothing is for sure.[1] We cannot choose to ignore the fact that life is a mystery, and therefore we must always leave room for the benefit of the doubt even for those things we don’t want to believe in.

            Fear is something to be respected but not something to be intimidated by. Fear is something to be watchful for, but not something to obsess about. Feeling afraid can sometimes be a warning signal, to advise us not to go in a certain direction or to act in a certain manner. Our fears can be our best friends because they can warn us about areas in our lives we need to be careful about. Other times, fears are the products of our imaginations, and they must be controlled.

            One thing is essential and that is to not let ourselves be conquered or frozen by our fears. We need to have faith and trust that God always takes care of us. God is more powerful than anything, and He loves us and protects us. When we are afraid, we need to think about how God is our refugee and our fortress, and repeat that to ourselves. We who are sheltered under His shadow and are protected by His loving wings must cling to Him in our darkest moments. If we call upon Him, He will protect us. There need be no doubt in our hearts.

Wisdom to contemplate:

“Have no anxiety at all, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God. Then the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:6-7)

“You who dwell in the shelter of the Most High, who abide in the shadow of the Almighty, say to the LORD, ‘My refuge and fortress, my God in whom I trust.’ God will rescue you from the fowler's snare, from the destroying plague, will shelter you with pinions, spread wings that you may take refuge; God's faithfulness is a protecting shield. You shall not fear the terror of the night nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence that roams in darkness, nor the plague that ravages at noon.

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[1] Gary Zukav, The Dancing Wu Li Masters (Harper Collins, 2001).

Cruel Kids - Have you been bullied?

Cruel Kids?

Have you been bullied?  Many kids have.  Kids can be cruel sometimes, bruising their peers in the most profound way, shattering their self-confidence, making them feel miserable, utterly disappointed and troubled. Isn’t it ironic, that it is only after growing up a bit that we start becoming aware of our looks? I don’t think many parents realize the importance of teaching their children to be kind. And I don’t think many parents realize how much a child can suffer in school. In some people’s opinion, children don’t have problems, only adults. But this is not true. Everything is proportional to the person experiencing it. For little children, a problem that can seem trivial to an adult can deeply hurt their feelings and leave them heartbroken.  

Not everybody is nice in the world, but that that does not mean everybody is mean. Not everybody is nice in the world, but that is no reason to join them. There will always be mean people, jealous people, angry people, bitter people and envious people in our lives. But there will always be good, kind, friendly, compassionate, caring people, too. So, we must open our eyes and search for the people who are worth our while, instead of getting disappointed thinking that people are all bad. By giving a chance to others, we are really giving a chance to ourselves.

It is important to make sure we do not become infected by bitterness or become mean ourselves. We must make an effort to always be excellent, no matter how hard things get. When someone says something to us, we have to know it is not a fact, but just a disputable opinion that person has about us. We should not let it bother us. An opinion is just a guess, a supposition, a generalization somebody makes about us. It is harmless unless we allow it to become important, since it will not be true unless we make it true.

• Why give people or words an importance that they do not deserve?
• Why do we insist on being offended by what other people say?
• Who cares what someone else calls me if I know who I am for real? 
• Why should it be such a tragedy to be called a name? Who cares? 
• Why do we insist on giving so much importance to other people’s opinions of us? 

  

We cannot change certain people, but we can ignore them. We cannot change certain people, but we can always change ourselves. Let’s therefore focus on ourselves that we may be stronger and turn into better people, so that we can keep a good equilibrium in this world bringing to it goodness and love. Let’s make a point out of becoming more confident. To be sure of ourselves is one of the most valuable lessons we will ever learn, and it is never too late. Let’s make it our goal to find reasons to be happy instead of reasons to be offended. Let’s make it our life’s task to learn to be less mean. After all, after a while the mean people may get tired of being mean, and after a while being nice and kind becomes contagious.

We all have encountered at some point in time someone trying to hurt us. Let’s be more confident inside from now on, remembering that anything anybody says about us is just their opinion. 

Wisdom to contemplate:

“Rejoice in hope, endure in affliction, persevere in prayer.” (Romans 12:12)

Continue your kindness toward your friends, your just defense of the honest heart. Do not let the foot of the proud overtake me, nor the hand of the wicked disturb me.” (Psalm 36:11-12)